“Oh yeah, and now I’m an escort!” I was catching up with somebody I hadn’t seen in a few years.
They looked kind of puzzled. “Didn’t you always do that?”
“Well, no. I mean, kind of… well, it’s different.”
They shrugged. “It seems like everyone I know in the sex industry does a little of that, so I just assumed…”
Well, it’s different. But I realized the differences probably don’t look any different to people on the outside and might even seem boring, so I saved it for a blog post.
Imagine this, how it used to be, the golden age of the sex industry:
You blow into town. You think, “wouldn’t it be nice if I fucked a dude with a strap on and he gave me $200?” So you write an ad for that and you get 16 emails from guys who would like to fulfill that fantasy for you. You pick the two that sound the most compatible, and that evening you’ve got $400 (well, $300 after hotel) and a better broken in strap on.
BUT THEN! Imagine some puritan assholes shut down craigslist which was the only place in the world where you could place a “sexually explicit” ad. Imagine you can only advertise your time and no specific boundaries or things you think are hot. Imagine you won’t be blowing through towns and the only way to build your business is to ambiguously advertise your “time” for sale and hope to build up great reviews and a reputation that will attract good customers.
So you build a website. You get good pictures. You register yourself on every advertising and review site in your area. You try a million ways to non sexually explain the kind of sex you might like to have in wording that will not put you in jail and you consider that that kind of sex will make it into your reviews and be what men expect from you for ever and ever. You consider the potential effects of bad reviews and whether your step-uncles who always come to the strip club will find your escort site. Is your ad copy alienating the working class? Are you not attracting the leisure class? Don’t forget, you’re now a leisure item.
Now it’s time to go to town. Don’t forget to advertise two weeks ahead of time and email all your regulars. Get a calender. Don’t write in the calender, imagine if the cops got ahold of that? Screen the fuck out of all your new clients, cause all the arrests go in the newspaper your mom reads and all those reviews might not be so great in court.
Stay up reading your reviews. They like you, they really like you! What kind of person reads these reviews and wants to see you? What kind of person reads these reviews and doesn’t want to see you? Do clients know that TER won’t let you give me a 10 unless I do anal, or do they think my 7 is because I suck? When clients mention me in other ladies reviews, how should I take it?
Priceline at the last minute, go over your schedule, how many months of expenses can you make in two days? Don’t forget to subtract expenses. Don’t book too many guys in a day. No one deserves sloppy sevenths. Three is the magic number. But if three people want me Thursday, nobody wants me Friday or Saturday, and four people want me Sunday, does that mean I should stay longer?
Now hope that you wake up five days from now wanting to have five hours of excellent sex. Hope that you’ll feel like looking into souls, listening to body language, reading chakras like traffic lights, orchestrating and surrendering to ecstasy.
And it turns out you do. It turns out you can do it again and again and again, and you love it.
It’s magic, but it’s much harder magic.
Whore is a term i find offensive. It’s all too commonly used as a derogatory term for women who are not ashamed of their sexuality…and used most frequently by other women. Thankfully things are changing, slowly, but they are changing in the minds of most, women are embracing sexuality, and most men have secretly loved those women who understood that sex is a recreation…not solely in the domain of loving a person.
Your ‘reviews’ are entirely subjective…the client may, or may not, enjoy the sex with you based on many things outside your control…his mood, medications, alcohol, stress level, and plain old chemistry in pheromones. I would like every woman who has sex with me claim it was wonderful and mean it, but the truth is there are complicating factors none of us can control. You can have great stunning sex with someone one day, and the next days sex is mediocre…it’s the nature of people. He may even write the review days later when the joy of it has faded…so don’t be too concerned with bad reviews, delete the ones that will hurt your service, but leave one or two mediocre reviews in there to portray integrity. If you can reply to negative posts i would suggest you do so, but not in a defensive manner…try; ‘Yeah, we were both a little drunk, i hope next time is as hot as we want it to be.’ …or… ‘I did notice you weren’t in such a great mood, perhaps next time we can spend some time relaxing first with a nice massage or some champagne’
I love the female body, but it isn’t always what’s between your legs that captures me sexually, it’s what’s between your ears, it’s your personality, it’s sometimes just compassion that most arouses me…i have or want sex with a person based on many different factors depending on the day and circumstances, i fear i’m complicated…but maybe men are simply just as complicated as women and have never examined their motives and desires before, so we’re seen as horny fuck machines who want nothing more in a woman than being sexually available…and that’s true sometimes too!
Good luck to you in your business, be safe and be happy.
Oh john… how would I ever run my business without well meaning advice from ignorant johns? *sigh*
Anyways, if you want whores to be able to delete reviews we don’t like, maybe you could write to TER and tell them so. It would be super handy if ladies who got arrested could delete their reviews before they ended up being read aloud in court, too.
Yay! The redesign looks great – I was getting worried there; glad to see ecowhore.com back.
I find it offensive when someone TELLS ME (or other people, like you) they find the name I gave myself & the way I identify offensive . . . and act like they’re offended ON MY BEHALF, like I’m too stupid to understand the meaning and implications and background and common perceptions of the word(s), and they are too attached to their concepts of it to allow for nuance, change, respect, complexity, etc. It’s not just about reclaiming The Sexy, it’s about money, consent, power . . . and simple things like being able to identify ourselves without someone thinking it’s their moral obligation to oppose our self-chosen names.
Backpage.com is basically everything that Craigslist used to be. They break it up by region and city just like craigslist.
Piece of ass here in Portland though goes for $80-$120 and without all of that SF bay area political bullshit. Model quality hotties max that out around $250 at a decent incall place. We have some awesome rent by the hour places in town including a really cool hot tub room place that runs $40-$80 and the $80 per hour suites are beautifully decorated little hot tub sex gardens, then there are the couple’s booths at the $10 porn store places which are kind of low grade, but OK. I just wish they put in showers but I guess they don’t want people camping out there.
There is a version of twitter here that is mainly for exotic dancers and their fans that I signed up a profile on. xoticspot.com That’s mainly dancers who might be enticed to work privately on the side though, not just straight up hookers but you know how that works. A girl works the clubs a little bit, gets a batch of regulars and then quits dancing for a while. The people just want to meet and get to know each other in a public place rather than some obligated surprise phone call meet at the corner sight unseen sort of thing.